11/20/2005

Welcome to Bush mass for shut ins

A classic series from the Yahoo Soars Board, "first church" has his sermon every Sunday, since 2003.

Welcome to Bush mass for shut ins
by: first_church_of_bush

LIVE FROM THE ST GEORGE THE BLESSED CATHERDRAL IN CRAWFORD TEXAS ITS BUSH MASS FOR SHUT INS!

Good morning Bush worshippers, those who are ill and those who it's just best not to mix with society. May Lord God Bush bless you all for coming. For it is he who brought us life and everything else. He is a thousand points of light! He makes the sun rise in the morning, puts the frost on our flakes and puts the fruit on the trees. All praise the glory of Lord God Bush. Today we celebrate Staying."

STAYING CELEBRATION
This week our holy oil crusaders were allowed by Lord God Bush to stay another year to kill and blow stuff up in the land of oil. We should all be grateful to Lord God Bush for this and thank him in our prayers today.

SING PRAISE TO LORD GOD BUSH
by: church_of_bush_choir

He's five foot-two, and he's six feet-four,
He fights with missiles and with spears.
He's all of thirty-one, and he's only seventeen,
Been a soldier for a thousand years.
He'a a Catholic, a Hindu, an Atheist, a Jain, A Buddhist and a Baptist and a Jew.
And he knows he shouldn't kill,
And he knows he always will,
Kill you for me my friend and me for you.
And he's fighting for Canada,
He's fighting for France,
He's fighting for the USA,
And he's fighting for the Russians,
And he's fighting for Japan,
And he thinks we'll put an end to war this way.
And he's fighting for Democracy,
He's fighting for the Reds,
He says it's for the peace of all.
He's the one who must decide,
Who's to live and who's to die,
And he never sees the writing on the wall.
But without him, How would Hitler have condemned him at Dachau?
Without him Caesar would have stood alone,
He's the one who gives his body As a weapon of the war,
And without him all this killing can't go on.
He's the Universal Soldier and he really is to blame,
His orders come from far away no more,
They come from here and there and you and me,
And brothers can't you see,
This is not the way we put the end to war.

A READING FROM THE BOOK OF RUMSFELD
Then Lord God Bush looked down upon the people and spoke. `I will allow my holy oil crusaders to stay for another year.` The crusaders then screamed with happiness and celebrated, a look of glee came over all the faces.

Re: A READING FROM THE BOOK OF RUMSFELD
What is it that the Profit Rumsfeld is trying to teach us? It is that it is good the crusaders are staying another year, if we disagree we obviously hate America. This is the word of George.

Re: A READING FROM THE BOOK OF RUMSFELD
Your attendance has been recorded and will be sent to the United States Department of Holiness. Go in arrogance, may the Lord God George W Bush be with you. And tis the season! We are please to welcome back the bushmas carolers to sing us a bushmas carol!

TIS THE SEASON
by: bushmas_carolers

I'll be home for Bushmas
You can count on me
Please have snow and mistletoe
and presents on the tree

Bushmas Eve will find me
Where the love light gleams
I'll be home for Bushmas
If only in my dreams

Bush mass is over
by: second_church_of_bush
Your attendance has been recorded and will be sent to the United States Department of Holiness. Go in arrogance, may the Lord God George W Bush be with you. And tis the season! We are please to welcome back the bushmas carolers to sing us a bushmas carol!

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