8/20/2005

Disturbing the Universe: Stem Cell Research and Creative Problem Solving

You see we have a conundrum, how do we accomplish this research and save our friends lives, without sinning in the process. I thought the right-wing think tanks were working on this problem 24-7, but apparently not, since the solution is so obvious.

I offer the following solution to all members of the right-wing who influence public policy:

Outlaw all stem cell research in the United States. Thereby South Korea and the United Kingdom will continue to develop this research. When the research is developed enough to be applied to humans, simply bomb South Korea and the United Kingdom to Hell until they unconditionally surrender their countries, hence giving us access to their life saving technologies. Now this is the perfect solution, as only the South Koreans and the Brits are stuck with the blastocysts' blood on their hands. Meanwhile the U.S. only has the blood of post-borns on its hands, which is well known to be water soluble and therefore washes off in any rainstorm.

[UPDATE] I have been informed by a reader, who happens to be a doctor, not all post-borns have water soluble blood. Although it's true that the blood of once-borns can be rinsed off with water, apparently the blood of twice-borns (born-agains) contains dyes that leave permanent stains.

Disturbing the Universe: Stem Cell Research and Creative Problem Solving

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home